For the last four-and-a-half months, I’ve been living a nightmare.

Granted, being laid off from your job won’t be the worst thing that could happen to you. However, I can tell you being laid off — especially after spending more than a decade sacrificing weekends and nights working at a place and in a role you loved so much – really hurts.

But my terrible dream ended on Jan. 3. I’ve been fortunate enough to have landed a position with a leader in its field. Many have told me how lucky I’ve been to get a role with this company and in this industry. I’m taking that greatly to heart. I’m extremely appreciative.

The one thing I always told the interns and entry-level types who worked in our department in my previous job was to “pay it forward.” You can’t put a price tag on wisdom and experience. Hopefully, someone will benefit in the long run.
As this chapter of my life closes and as I enter a new and exciting one, I want to pass on some friendly advice to everyone looking for a new opportunity. These are things I learned or had reinforced during my time on the beach.

Use it or ignore it. Take some and toss the rest. But this is all part of the “pay it forward” philosophy. It’s in no particular order because everything is important.

IT’S YOUR JOB TO FIND A JOB

If you’re still working, it’s hard to find time to look for work – remember people say it’s easier to find a new position when you’re working. But if you’re not working, finding work should be your full-time job.

Regardless of your status, be prepared to invest time. If you’re out of work, you can’t be casually looking for work. It takes time to plant seeds with people and see how your results grow. So be prepared to spend eight hours each work day looking for work.

If you’re looking while employed, make sure you’re discreet (do it from home). And if you’re set on looking for a new job, be prepared to work hard. Just don’t let it get in the way of your daily role.

In either case, it’s not easy, but all you need is one person to say “yes.”

KEEP YOUR RESUME AND LINKEDIN PROFILE CURRENT

Don’t be caught off guard. Make sure your resume and LinkedIn profile are relevant. When I got laid off, most of my resume was already done, but it needed polish and an update. Then I took that resume and applied it to my LinkedIn profile.
Just how important is LinkedIn? Recruiters and possible employers have an easier time reviewing your CV via LinkedIn than going through the process of getting an E-mail and opening the attached PDF. Don’t create more work for those looking to give you that opportunity. Also make sure you have a good mug shot. Don’t use something taken from the annual family reunion. LinkedIn isn’t Facebook.

Make your CV easy to read. Long paragraphs are no good. Bullet points are soothing to the eyes. Make sure you use key words to get their attention. Everyone’s key words are different, based on your field of expertise. A resume writer or a career counselor (aka outplacement counseling) can help you get those key words.

One more thing about key words: they’re important to get you noticed. When you apply online, your application will be read by a computer. Get to know these “job” vehicles such as Taleo and Jobvite. If the computer doesn’t see the key words, you won’t even get in the faceoff circle.

SOCIAL MEDIA

Want to know what jobs are hot? Many companies list job openings on their Twitter accounts. Facebook has a job app that you can access, too.

Speaking of Facebook, if you don’t want an employer to get a glimpse of your personal life, make sure you restrict access to your page. Many people post items that aren’t meant for the general public on their Facebook pages. The last thing a potential employer needs to see is your profanity-laced rant on why the Oakland Raiders need a new defensive coordinator.

FOCUS ON THE “85 PERCENT”

A lot of talk over the last quarter of 2011 has been on the 99 percent. That’s about the economy. But for job seekers, the “85 percent” is very important.

What’s the “85 percent”? That’s the percentage of open jobs that don’t get publicized. These are positions one finds through friends and connections. The competition is way less. Obviously, your chances of landing an “85 percent” position are better than those in the “15 percent” category.

I’m living proof. Nearly every job – including my new role — I’ve had is because it was in the 85 percent.

The “15 percent” of jobs are those you find on job boards such as Indeed.com and simplyhired.com and Twitter. A LOT of people apply for those positions. The odds of you getting an interview drop because of the amount of people who apply. In addition, companies are required by law to list open positions for five business days, even though they’ve got a candidate already in mind.

You won’t have instant success with the “85 percent.” Yet, it’s still important. So with that in mind…

STAY CONNECTED

You’ve already built a network of friends and business associates from your current or previous positions. You may have a network of friends from your social activities, church or the neighborhood. Don’t forget them. You’ll be using them in your job search. You may be using them in your current or future position.

Take time to drop them an E-mail once in awhile. You may see a link to a news article that could be of interest. You may want to wish them a happy birthday (and don’t drop them a fly-by HBD via Facebook). Or you may just want to say hello. Personalize your message. Ramdom acts of kindness don’t cost a lot of money or take a bundle of time. But the bottom line: be real – don’t expect anything in return — and be yourself.

Don’t forget to build up your LinkedIn connections. Have a solid number of contacts. You could have 500-plus contacts, but if you’re doing that just to make yourself look important, they’re no good to you or your friends and colleagues that would like to use them. Think quality over quantity.

FAMILY

When I was looking for work, and as with anything I do, I get so focused I lose sight of a lot of things. I get tunnel vision. That’s great for work ethic, but bad for your personal life.

Try not to forget your spouse, significant other and your children when you’re on the search. It’s easy to do. Every minute is precious. Every lost hour without work is lost money. But even though you’re working hard at finding work to help them, they need your time, too.

My wife had to pull my reigns in many times. She was mad plenty of times. Just try your best. It may not be good enough, but sincerely try your best.

“THANK YOU”

When you connect, reconnect, seek assistance or ask for patience from your family and friends, don’t forget to say “thank you.” You get so wound up with everything that it’s very easy to forget to show appreciation to others.

Many people took me out to breakfast, lunch, dinner or for a warm morning beverage during my time in limbo. Many people also tried to help me find work. I’ll never forget their kindness and understanding. I greatly appreciate their efforts.

Most important, don’t forget those two words. “Thank you” is everyone’s gold standard for appreciation. Also, be sure to share your good news. Everyone you’ve touched during your down time played a role, even if they couldn’t help you.

THE BODY IS THE TEMPLE

Your health is important. Make sure you eat right and get exercise. Eating right means staying away from processed food and anything with high fructose corn syrup. Eat lots of fresh vegetables and fruit. Focus on organic foods when possible. Watch the coffee consumption – you’ll be wired enough looking for work. Stay away from soda. The sugars and chemicals in those drinks aren’t good for you and won’t help your stress. Drink alcohol in moderation.

Go for a run. Take a long bike ride somewhere. Play hockey or hoops. Hit some golf balls. DO SOMETHING PHYSICAL. That will help your stress level.

Another part of staying active is doing side work. For example, I work game days for two NFL teams and an NCAA Division 1 Women’s Basketball program in media relations-related capacities. I also wrote and edited for a publication. Those jobs supplemented my unemployment income, but also kept me in the industry loop, helped me keep my skills sharp and stay connected with individuals.

SHOW ME THE MONEY

This section is especially for those still employed.

During my travails, I’ve learned a lot of my friends, colleagues and business associates had been laid off at least once in their lives. That’s not good.

But you can be prepared so you don’t look totally naked financially.

This is hard to do, but consider saving enough money to help you survive for six months without work. This suggestion came from a well-known financial media personality. Her idea does make sense.

So you don’t go to Starbucks every day. Maybe you go to a matinee showing of a movie, or wait for it to come to pay-per-view or the DVD kiosk at the store. Perhaps you stop going out to eat every day. Do you really need another logo T-shirt?

You get the idea.

LIKE A CUB SCOUT…

Regardless of your field, it may be wise to look into other career options, even if you’re employed and loving your job.

The business climate these days dictates that nothing lasts forever. The days of gold watches and diamond-encrusted pins for length of service are like the typewriter: history.

So you should be prepared to make a change. In my line of work, I’ve seen what happened to people who were PR directors and communications people with professional sports teams. One went into real estate. Another is an executive director for a children’s care center. A few have their own consulting firms. Another is even a manager of a township on the East Coast.

Have a fallback plan. Be prepared. Make sure it’s something you’re passionate about. If you get laid off, your psyche and system will get a big jolt…bigger than you think. You can lessen the shock by being ready to call a career audible.

ATTITUDE

There’s no sense in me telling you to stay positive. You should know this already and next to looking for work, staying positive will be a challenge. I’ll be honest, being positive is very hard for me. I forced myself to be in this frame of mind. But if your mind isn’t filled with good thoughts, motivation will be a problem and you might make some bad decisions.

You can also control your job hunt work ethic. We’ve already touched on that. Yet, I can’t emphasize this enough. It’s a cruel world. The competition for jobs is fierce. Focus, focus, focus.

Don’t let your attitude cloud your job search. It’s okay to be upset, angry and worried. But remember what President Bill Clinton did a few years ago. When he was having personal problems, Clinton was always able to compartmentalize those issues and properly focus on the day’s tasks. Never mind his self-inflicted actions and his politics. What Clinton did was herculean.

If you’re already a Gloomy Gus or Gloria, you have to put on a sincere happy face when looking for work and especially when getting interviews. The person on the other end will immediately notice if there’s a dark cloud over your head.

Another way to help your attitude is to keep a daily routine. When you have a set schedule, you’ll have peace of mind with some structure in an unstructured situation. Also, plan a daily schedule like you’d do at work.

There’s one more part about attitude: patience. I have none. That hurts in a situation like this. Don’t be like me. If you can have patience and know you can’t worry about things out of your control, your emotional state will be better.

THE RULE OF THREE

For every act of kindness you bestow to someone, you’ll get paid back in threes. Also note that for every act of unkindness, you’ll get yours in threes, too.

Why is this important in the job search? It helps you BELIEVE. And everyone needs a lot of BELIEVE when looking for work.

“IT WILL COME TO AN END”

Early in my job search, two people (my outplacement counselor and another a person who’d been down my road before) each told me this. I knew that was true, but they didn’t say “when.”

They were right. If you talk to your friends, colleagues and others who’ve been down this path, they’ll say it comes to an end. For some, they get lucky and it ends early. For others, it’s like watching a Stanley Cup Playoffs game that goes into quadruple overtime. You wonder when it will end. But it does.

PAY IT FORWARD

Probably the most important thing you can do. Remember your experiences, no matter how painful. Share them with others, especially those looking for work and to people who could be looking in the future. Knowledge is power.

Maybe the corporate world has turned into a cruel and inhuman place, but a job seeker needs to know they’re not alone. Many have walked in their shoes. It doesn’t matter if you’re white or blue collar, the feelings and experiences are nearly the same for everyone. Take the time to help someone else.

May 2012 be a better year for all of us, especially for my friends still sitting on the bench waiting for their turn to skate onto the ice.

Tony Khing appears as special guest contributor to Voice of the Box